Thanks as usual, Katy - when I read your posts I feel like I've been offered a great big dollup of permission. I shouldn't need it from you, or anyone else, but tough - I do, and it's lovely. :)
Love this. Christmas got so much better for me when I realised I serve exactly the same food every year and no-one got as bored as the TV chefs claim. Brussels sprouts do not need to be disguised if you actually like them; carrots are nice with butter. It’s all absolutely fine and no-one needs your culinary martyrdom.
We are going to be mid house move this year, and my other half is working, so ours will be a very unconventional Christmas this year. Probably for the best, as we are still finding our way after losing Mum and Dad, before and after last Christmas, respectively. You do you. ❤️
My dad lost his dad around Christmas and my mum lost her mum. They didn't feel like celebrating for a long time after that and they decided to step back until they were ready to renegotiate the season on their terms. It's no bad thing. Sending you love. x
Thank you! Christmas creates all kinds of anxiety for me - not the decorating, which I love - but the gifting. I never feel as if I get the right thing for people and we have SO MANY children and grandchildren that the stress and expense are overwhelming. We stopped doing gifts with the adult kids but are still trying to figure out how to navigate gifts for 9 grandchildren. Your words give me permission to step back and rethink these obligations based on what is best for me, not for everyone else.
All my kids are broke this year and so we have all agreed that small is beautiful, and if the right thing doesn't come along we are happy to wait. It's hard when children are little but much easier later on. xx
thank you Katy. love this! and really, not eveyone even celebrates christmas! i gave up on having expectations for christmas and it really does make life more enjoyable. we don't exchange gifts anymore in my small family, though year round if i see something for someone, that is when i "gift." and every christmas eve i watch animated "the snowman" (Raymond Briggs.) just love that story and i always cry at the end. sigh. may peace and calm be your gift in the weeks ahead. big hugs to you.
Love this! We’ve made our own culinary traditions for Christmas (crab and garlic bread plus whatever else we feel like), and it’s so easy. I think my mom and I enjoy it the most, and my husband tolerates the shrimp I make since he doesn’t eat crab. But it’s the one day of the year I’m just making what I want and enjoying it.
I wish I could have sent this out to everyone when I announced that I wasn’t doing Christmas this year... I really can’t cope with the overwhelm and need the gift of time with few commitments . This is the gift I most need this year. It feels wonderful.
When I worked at an answering service, I would work on Christmas. The day was usually quiet, we got double overtime for a four-hour shift, and "my" celebration was Yule, the Winter Solstice, so I had all of the celebrating out of the way.
Of late, I have joined my Jewish husband in finding a Chinese restaurant for "Christmas" dinner. We talk about a "Chistmukkah" holiday, but have yet to execute it.
Great post. I used to always have tears from overwhelm at Christmas too. We now just do us at home in a much gentler way, I recently posted about Christmas and overwhelm too. I agree with so much of what you say!! X
Our children like to have Christmas Day at home with their little ones so it’s just the 2 of us on THE day…very laid back and chilled. Best of all, my son and daughter-in-law now have a house big enough for all of us to visit comfortably so they are happy to host the massed get-together….an excellent result as cooking and serving a roast dinner for 9 in our kitchen was becoming increasingly difficult. I love cooking but there simply isn’t space for 9 people to sit around the table.
That's it. We struggle here on the boat. We manage, but it is an intimacy that can wear a bit thin after a few days. We all get on top of each other and we all get tired and need our space. Families need room. x
Thanks as usual, Katy - when I read your posts I feel like I've been offered a great big dollup of permission. I shouldn't need it from you, or anyone else, but tough - I do, and it's lovely. :)
I think we all just need a little nudge now and again xx
I feel exactly the same way about this post — thank you for offering what feels like a spell: “you do not have to”. It truly is a gift.
Yes! I am super into the idea of spells at the moment so I love this. Thank you for offering it up. x
"I do not have to? I do not have to .. I do not have to. I do not have to!"
Sometimes we need to hear it out loud to make it real.
Yes! x
Love this. Christmas got so much better for me when I realised I serve exactly the same food every year and no-one got as bored as the TV chefs claim. Brussels sprouts do not need to be disguised if you actually like them; carrots are nice with butter. It’s all absolutely fine and no-one needs your culinary martyrdom.
Exactly. We like what we like. There's no need to keep innovating unless we want to. @annabrones advent post for today reminds me of that. x
This was lovely. Also going to have this line with me all day now: "I contain multitudes. All of them fiery."
Ha! x
We are going to be mid house move this year, and my other half is working, so ours will be a very unconventional Christmas this year. Probably for the best, as we are still finding our way after losing Mum and Dad, before and after last Christmas, respectively. You do you. ❤️
My dad lost his dad around Christmas and my mum lost her mum. They didn't feel like celebrating for a long time after that and they decided to step back until they were ready to renegotiate the season on their terms. It's no bad thing. Sending you love. x
Thank you! Christmas creates all kinds of anxiety for me - not the decorating, which I love - but the gifting. I never feel as if I get the right thing for people and we have SO MANY children and grandchildren that the stress and expense are overwhelming. We stopped doing gifts with the adult kids but are still trying to figure out how to navigate gifts for 9 grandchildren. Your words give me permission to step back and rethink these obligations based on what is best for me, not for everyone else.
All my kids are broke this year and so we have all agreed that small is beautiful, and if the right thing doesn't come along we are happy to wait. It's hard when children are little but much easier later on. xx
thank you Katy. love this! and really, not eveyone even celebrates christmas! i gave up on having expectations for christmas and it really does make life more enjoyable. we don't exchange gifts anymore in my small family, though year round if i see something for someone, that is when i "gift." and every christmas eve i watch animated "the snowman" (Raymond Briggs.) just love that story and i always cry at the end. sigh. may peace and calm be your gift in the weeks ahead. big hugs to you.
Hugs back to you, too. xx
Love this! We’ve made our own culinary traditions for Christmas (crab and garlic bread plus whatever else we feel like), and it’s so easy. I think my mom and I enjoy it the most, and my husband tolerates the shrimp I make since he doesn’t eat crab. But it’s the one day of the year I’m just making what I want and enjoying it.
crab and garlic bread sounds elite.
Thank you.
I wish I could have sent this out to everyone when I announced that I wasn’t doing Christmas this year... I really can’t cope with the overwhelm and need the gift of time with few commitments . This is the gift I most need this year. It feels wonderful.
I gave myself permission........
At last..
I'm so happy that you did. xx
When I worked at an answering service, I would work on Christmas. The day was usually quiet, we got double overtime for a four-hour shift, and "my" celebration was Yule, the Winter Solstice, so I had all of the celebrating out of the way.
Of late, I have joined my Jewish husband in finding a Chinese restaurant for "Christmas" dinner. We talk about a "Chistmukkah" holiday, but have yet to execute it.
Chinese food is just the best for an all encompassing celebration of almost anything you care to mention. x
Great post. I used to always have tears from overwhelm at Christmas too. We now just do us at home in a much gentler way, I recently posted about Christmas and overwhelm too. I agree with so much of what you say!! X
It's so nice to pare things down. I'm glad you've found the space for gentleness. x
Omg you’re fabulous and funny, and I’m going to clutch THIS guide to my chest for the next four weeks (if not for life).
Thank you. xx
Yes yes yes. After reading this in the morning, I gave myself the gift of a long drive with my favorite tunes. Highly recommend.
Oh yes! I love that. I'm off to my mum's tomorrow and I have an audio book I have been saving and I'm so excited. x
So much sense here, Katy. Amen to all of it!
xx
Our children like to have Christmas Day at home with their little ones so it’s just the 2 of us on THE day…very laid back and chilled. Best of all, my son and daughter-in-law now have a house big enough for all of us to visit comfortably so they are happy to host the massed get-together….an excellent result as cooking and serving a roast dinner for 9 in our kitchen was becoming increasingly difficult. I love cooking but there simply isn’t space for 9 people to sit around the table.
That's it. We struggle here on the boat. We manage, but it is an intimacy that can wear a bit thin after a few days. We all get on top of each other and we all get tired and need our space. Families need room. x